Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize