you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
