I think i sorta joined a cult last night
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
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