He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
