gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
