There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Still dying that you shit outside
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
