So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
