Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Watching her eat just hurts me
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize