i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
