This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
