This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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