we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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