no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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