Sry I called you an 8
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Randomize
