Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
