My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
