I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
