White coat. Heels.
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize
