Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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