Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
