Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Randomize
