I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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