she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
