Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I think a kid would responsible me up
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I need water and some morals
I am mentally ready for anal.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
