i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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