I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
