Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
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