My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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