Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize