Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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