Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
you never un-have a 4some
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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