In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
how can u be prego again
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
