I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
