i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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