So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
