Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
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