Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
