I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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