I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
