is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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