I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
