giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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