remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Oh god it's open bar.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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