You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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