As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
