i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
