How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
