After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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