They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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