i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
